Archive for the ‘Drinking Games’ Category

 

9am

Earliest I’ve been up at in a while in my attempt to be a more approachable member of society.

We’re throwing a party tonight, my first as an official resident at the Academy, and there’s hope throughout the place that it’ll be a night or weirdness to remember.

Tea

I should start writing earlier in the day. I had better stuff in my head while still hard with the sunrise. I guess there’s a choice of getting off or getting to work.

Sent off the first application to [XXXX] yesterday, another goes off today. We’ll see what happens.

Got to make cider and get the house in order. I always think I’m gonna come up with something different and special, but it’s always the same:

Fancy unfiltered cider from TJs or Whole foods or whatever.

Clove, allspice, nutmeg, cinnamon (all things whole)

Oranges

Liquor (used to be brandy, last year it was bourbon, this year it’s blackstrap rum [3 bottles] and a dash of a few other things.

This year I’m going CRAZY! By adding some pineapple juice.

[3 days later]

Holy spoot, I just took my first shit since the part started on Friday. It was about 7 feet long and felt glorious. I’m measurably lighter I’m sure.

Though I had to excuse myself from a meeting with a friend which made for an awkward return to the table. The person at the table next gave a useless, gratuitous little motion as I got up to leave as if they were actually moving out of the way. On the way they give me one of those glances to indicate you were gone too long for you to be doing anything else. Now you have to sit here while we politely ignore each other.

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One of the few great things about air travel is the drinking. In an environment which (even to a drunk like me) seems one of the most unpleasant places to drink. It is almost mandatory.

Airports seem to have the longest open hours for bars. Every time I roll through a terminal I see people bound for somewhere having a cocktail with a business associate or reading a paper. I’m often there at 7 or 10 in the morning and there they are, grabbing a quick McDonald’s breakfast then popping over for a glass of champagne at Bubbles, the O’Hare wine bar.

It’s strange. And no matter what time my flight is the air hostess always walks past and asks if you like a beer or a glass of wine.

Because we all pretend we’re drinking for different time zones and every other drink you get is served by a different person. So no one is judging.

I land in Atlantic time, but I got an hour and a half to kill before the rest of my party arrives and we’re sharing a ride, so I might as well grab a breakfast beer, no one will notice. I’ll be done before they even arrive and then it will be about right for lunch and I’ll see if anyone else wants one.

Look I know they haven’t started serving lunch yet, but I’m on my way to Zürich and I need to get my drinking schedule in sync with corporate now. And show stole my john girsham paperback.

Shuffle Says: “The Kids Are Alright” The Who

OK I KNOW you’ve all been good little citizens and seen the State of the Union address already, but JUST in case you haven’t or want to watch it again (but with more fun and friends) here’s a late edition

First, watch the enhanced version to give you a little something extra to follow.

 

FOR REAL POLITICAL DRINKERS ONLY: Drink at every applause break.
for those who already kept score at home or rushed off to Politico for spoilers that’s around 80 drinks, so choose your drink wisely.

Otherwise, here’s a more sensible game: Drink whenever John Boehner can barely mask his utter disdain for the President or whenever Joe Biden makes a goofy face

Shuffle Says: Something by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts I can’t Identify because I’m not near the stereo and I’m too lazy to get up.

Finally! A new game. As it has been a while since I’ve posted a new game I’m going to keep it fairly simple.

Drink once whenever:

1. You see lens flare

The end*

Good to see y’all again.

*This game can also be played with the last installment of the Star Trek reboot.**

**this game can also be played with ANY JJ Abrams movie.

NaNo count(as of 1500hrs Nov 7th): 1206

Shuffle Says: “Ashes in the Fall” Rage Against the Machine The Battle of Los Angeles

This one was submitted by my friend spike over at elizabolt.tumbler.com

Place a mustache on the TV and turn on a movie. Drink whenever someones face lines up with it. Like so

For added difficulty. Just keep adding mustaches.

 

and keep fuckin that chicken.

Night night, boppers

Shuffle Says: “Nightrider” Electric Light Orchestra Flashback (disc 2)

Today’s game is simple. It’s something that I just started doing at some point in my life. I noticed if a female character in a movie or on TV started retching I automatically assumed she was pregnant. So here goes:

This game can be used as an easy ad hoc rule to supplement another game or as a running house rule.

Whenever a woman (in a film or show) throws up, yell out “She’s Preggers!”. When that fact is inevitably revealed, everyone but you finishes their drinks. However, if you reach the end of the story and the woman never turns out to be with child, you must kill the dregs of all the drinks in the room.

 

Gamble at your own risk, but Vegas odds are 9 to 2 in your favour

Shuffle Says: “Walk Through the Fire” Alyson Hannigan et al. Once More with Feeling, Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Like anything Joss Whedon, Buffy makes for easy gaming. There are lots of versions of this so, as always, feel free to mix n’ match some.

BEGINNERS’ RULES:

Drink once whenever a vampire is killed

Drink twice if a human is killed

Drink Twice if someone other than Buffy kills something

Drink once every time Giles adjusts/takes off/puts on his glasses

ADVANCED DRINKER RULES:

Drink whenever part of Buffy’s house/the magic shop/the school/the bronze is destroyed.

Drink whenever a Scooby has sex

Drink Suspiciously whenever a term like ‘slayer’ or ‘magic’ is used as a metaphor for  gay or sex or gay sex

EXPERTS ONLY:

Whenever someone vows to kill the slayer, waterfall. Don’t stop until the person ahead of you says that they will kill her.

Each person has a standing non-slayer character. Finish your drink if your character is captured/rendered unconcious/gets their ass kicked.

Finish everyone else’s drinks if you character dies

HELLMOUTH BONUS RULES:

Whenever an explanation is needed for supernatural, the last person to come up with something (or alternatively has the worst excuse) is the new Hellmouth

The Hellmouth must drink whenever the Hellmouth is mentioned

If the Hellmouth yells out a clever kill phrase when a bad guy is killed they can choose a new Hellmouth.

kill all booze when the slayer dies

GRRR!! ARRG!!